what a scare

Few days ago on our little weekend trip to Gunma, I found a black patch on the bottom of Leigh's foot. Actually two. One is about 6mm in diameter and the other around 4-5mm. Ttwo of them very close together.
Oh the feeling of it when I first found it... I felt like a brick has fallen on my chest.
It didn't exist a few months ago and there it was all of sudden two mole like patches.
And I watched a documentary on skin cancer that occurs on the bottom of one's foot just months ago.

Naturally, I rushed my girl to the hospital and the doctor mentions what I feared the most.
Probability of melanoma.
Then she calls another doctor to get a second opinion on the spot.

This is why we all got scared:
1) the patch is too big to grow in such a short time
2) we thought she could have stepped on something hard and bled internally but the doctor confirmed it's not.
3) the doctor says since we found and came to the hospital so early, there is not much we can do except cut out a part and send it to the lab.

But in the end this is what we decided on:
The lab test will still get my girl freaked out big time. And with her anxiety and all we are too afraid to gamble with her reactions.
At least three shots on the foot then cutting out a part of her foot? omg.
I asked if it will make a difference if we tested now or in months time IF there are more symptoms indicating skin cancer.
The doctor said no, not really. (then why the heck she suggested we do that?!)
It would only hurt her if it wasn't skin cancer at all.

Now at the first sign of the following I will have to take my girl to the hospital:
1) The patch growing
2) The patch bleeding or producing any other thing
3) The patch becoming bulky etc etc...
All in all, any change and I am required to rush her immediately to see the doctor.

I must say I was scared but this is what I felt and thought in the end.
Even at time like this I feel being diagnosed as autism is more painful, depressing and hopeless.
It must be because with skin cancer there is hope and we caught it early but with autism.... I am reminded all the time that there is no cure and it feels more devastating in general.

We will be on monthly monitoring and I wish my girl all the best.

This blog is turning out to be my little cave of sadness.
Anybody reading this blog must think I am a sad little thing... I Just use this portal as my let out so feel free to leave and not read if it upsets you for any reasons.
Just to ensure you, when I am not on the blog, I am usually more happier and go about my day as any parents would.
Over and out.


Update: 2016.09.04
What a scare, the patch fell off in the end so we didn't go for many check ups at all.
We still don't know what it was. We are guessing she hurt herself, it bleed on the inside of the skin and somehow it came out and peeled off... never heard of such thing but so very thankful that it wasn't melanoma.